Parent Internet Workshop

I blogged about this last week.  I thought I would embed the workshop here.  You can also watch it directly on his Ustream Channel.

 

Technorati Tags: Tim Schmoyer , Teenagers and the Internet , Internet Safety , Parenting Helps

Church vs. Para-Church

Jonathan McKee wrote an excellent article at thesource4ym.com (link below).  Having been both a youth pastor in three local churches and now working for a para-church ministry this article resonates with me.  What do you think.  One thing that really jumped out at me was a quote by Chap Clark who is a professor of youth & family ministries at Fuller Theological Seminary, author of the book Hurt: Inside the World of Teenagers, and long-time veteran of Young Life.

"'Young Life is an expression of the Body of Christ reaching out to the world, and so they are an extension of the Church."

Para-Church ministries are part of the local church.  There shouldn't be any competition, and our kingdom building gets in the way of the true Kingdom.  What do you think?

Article: When "Us vs. Them" Trumps Kingdom Mentality, the Church/Para-church Fight Brought to the Table.

(HT: Gerrard Fess)

Technorati Tags: Church , Para-Church , Young Life , Chap Clark , Jonathan McKee , Youth Ministry

Teens & the Internet

Tim Schmoyer is presenting a live streaming workshop for parents to learn about teenagers and the online world on November 6th at 7:00pm (CST).

You can watch his promo video for it here or below.

What parents (and youthworkers) will learn:

Overview

• Teen usage of the Internet
• Misconceptions
• Sexual victimization
• Cyber bullying
• How home life affects Internet life
• Statistics

Introduction to social networking sites

• What is a social networking site?
• MySpace demo
• Facebook demo
• Deviant Art demo

Introduction to media sites

• How broadband has changed the Internet
• YouTube demo
• Flickr demo

Introduction to Instant Messenger

• What is Instant Messenger?
• AIM demo
• MSN demo
• Yahoo! demo
• Trillian demo

Introduction to blogs

• What is a blog?
• Facebook/MySpace
• Live Journal demo
• Xanga demo
• Blogger/Wordpress demo

Introduction to MMORPGs

• What is an MMORPG?
• Why are they so addicting?
• What is the spiritual influence?
• What’s good about them? What’s bad about them?
• How much time is too much?
• World of Warcraft demo

Potential upcoming social sites

• Twitter demo
• Virb demo
• Ustream.tv demo

What happened to email?

• Why kids don’t use email to communicate with each other.
• How kids communicate now and why: PM, SMS, IM

Tips for the home: What should we do with this info?

• Strategic computer placement
• Communicate with your teen
• Learn from your kids
• Search Google
• Learn from their history
• Your relationship makes all the difference
• Shoulder surfing
• A better solution than monitoring software
• Join your kids!

General Q&A for Tim and a panel of students

You can access the live workshop here.  Check it out and tell others!  Also, if you can't watch it live it will be recorded and be in the archive that can be accessed from the live streaming site on ustream.tv.

Technorati Tags: ustream.tv , Tim Schmoyer , Parenting Helps , Teenagers and the Internet , Youth Culture

Video: Aggressively Inarticulate Generation

A video of Slam poet Taylor Mali on our "aggressively inarticulate generation.  Made me laugh out loud and then think.

HT: Evangelical Outpost

Technorati Tags: Slam Poetry , Taylor Mali

Video: The History of Youth Ministry

Fridays are for funny videos, and I found an enlightening documentary in that treasure trove called YouTube on the true history of youth ministry. Enjoy.

Technorati Tags: Youth Ministry, Funny Videos

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Susan Estrich: LIttle Girls in a Sick Society

I don't agree with Susan Estrich on much, but I found my self shaking my head in agreement with this op-ed piece on the Fox News website.

We need to protect our daughters' innocence. I have mentioned on this blog before my daughters Kelvey and Lily dance. When we first started Kelvey dancing in Valparaiso, IN the dance studio we were with had the older girls were costumes for their recital that had me thinking as their dad, "over my cold dead body will Kelvey were that!"

I see girls, Kelvey's age (she just turned 11 this month) being "sexualized" it makes me incredibly sad. Where is the outrage? What the heck (I'm thinking a stronger word right now) are the parent(s) thinking? Our kids need us to be outraged about this. They need us to protect them. Flaunting your body is not a mark of maturity, but quite the contrary! Anyway, this article got me fired up this morning. I hope it fires you up as well.

Source: (FOXNews.com)

Technorati Tags: Youth Culture, Youth Ministry, Parenting, Immodesty

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Ministry Sacrifices

Like my dignity for starters. Oh, the things I do for ministry! This was at First Baptist Church in Pella where I help with the student ministries on an interim basis. They kicked off their Kidztown program last night, and I "volunteered" to be a part of a balloon stuff game. There were two teams who tried to stuff as many balloons in the long johns as possible. The kids got 27 balloons in mine, but alas my team lost. The other team was able to get 29 balloons in. I'm just thankful they were not water balloons! You can check out the videos that I embedded too.

Technorati Tags: youth ministry, life

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Common Misconceptions About Youth Ministry

I just finished re-reading an article that I had read a few years ago written by Mark Oestreicher of Youth Specialties called "What I Wish I Knew When I Started Youth Ministry, Part 1: My Stupid Misconceptions". Well they are not just his misconceptions. I know all of us who have been in youth ministry have held some or all of these misconceptions at one time or another (and perhaps even still). I have seen volunteers who have struggled with these misconceptions, as well as, parents, church board members and pastors. Read the article for a detailed explanation, but I wanted to list them here.

1. My role as a youth worker is to be a buddy to the students.
2. My role is to identify and confront all the sin in students' lives.
3. I can fix any student.
4. I've got to be cool, speak the lingo, play guitar, and throw around youth culture references.
5. Parents are the enemy; parents are the problem (obviously parents don't hold this one).
6. Advisory teams and boards are useless and slow you down.
7. I've got better ideas than other youth workers.
8. The best curriculum is the stuff I write.
9. Young adults make the best youth workers.
10. I'm in competition with other churches.
11. The goal is to be big.
12. Youth ministry is the most important ministry in the church.
13. Safety issues are for other people and other churches.
14. If you ignore problems, they'll go away.
15. A lot can be accomplished in the first year.
16. Eventually I'll have youth ministry totally figured out.

Are there any of these you take exception with? Are there others you would add? Leave a comment and let me know.

Technorati Tags: Youth Ministry, Youth Specialties, Mark Oestreicher, Misconceptions of Youth Workers

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Juveniles and Justice

I normally don't read Philippine news, but I have google news alerts for "juvenile justice" e-mailed to me and it is interesting what ends up in my inbox. An article, "What youth offenders need" in Tuesday's Manila Standard Today caught my eye as an example of how not to fix an ailing juvenile justice system.

The Philippines have had a horrible track record when it comes how youth have been treated in their criminal justice system. They had been placed in over-crowded jails along with adults. My position (one I share with the author of this article, Rita Linda V. Jimeno) is that juvenile offenders should not be placed in detention alongside of adults, ever. Why? There are four reasons why I hold this position:

• Their vulnerability: We do not want to see kids victimized by a prison culture that often preys upon the weak.
• Their brains: Current research regarding the teenage brain (yes they do have them) shows that the adolescent brain is immature in precisely the areas that regulate the behaviors that that are typical of adolescents who break the law. There seems to be lower impulse control, and they do not have the ability to consider long-term consequences in the same way as adults. This doesn't not excuse criminal behavior, but it does show that the decision making process for teenagers is quite different than it is for adults.
• Adult prison is often a criminal training ground: Do we want to put kids in an environment where they learn how to become better criminals? We don't want to see kids become hardened by serving time in an adult environment with adult criminals who will be a negative influence on impressionable kids.
• The current mentality that leads the charge to treat juveniles as adults: I feel is this mentality more about making political statements and making oneself appear to be "tough on crime" than it is about justice. Those who advocate this position, especially those who are followers of Christ need to be reminded of this verse - "He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God," (Micah 6:8, NIV). When you propose the same sentence for a 16-year-old as you would for a 45-year-old is that acting justly? Where does mercy come in? Are we walking humbly before God seeking His wisdom, or are we acting in a knee-jerk reactionary way? This is something we need to consider.
  

Back to the Philippines... in April 2006 the Philippine Congress passed a law called the "Juvenile Justice and Welfare Act", and according to the article I just read this law states that:

...youth offenders—15 years and below—are exempt from criminal liability. This means they cannot be prosecuted or imprisoned and must immediately be released to a social worker upon apprehension. Moreover, those in jail serving their terms, or awaiting the court’s verdict upon the enactment of the law, are also to be released if, at the time of the commission of the offense, they were 15 years of age or younger. And if a minor is above 15 but below 18, and commits a crime without discernment, then he will also be released.

I was just thinking about what would happen if we took this law and applied in the United States. Mass chaos would be the result. I would submit to you that this doesn't line with with the command in Micah 6:8 either... is this acting justly? No because it doesn't give any thought for the victim(s) involved with the crime. Is this loving mercy? Is it merciful to not hold juveniles accountable for their actions at all? No it isn't. These juvenile offenders in the Philippines who just got their "get out jail free cards" can re-offend, re-offend and re-offend and not learn a blessed thing. There are no consequences linked to their actions and that is frankly quite dangerous for them and for society in general. I would suspect that the Philippines will see an increase in juvenile crime. The only thing that has been reduced, as a result of this law, is the number of youth who are incarcerated.

What does it mean to act justly and to love mercy in regards to our juvenile justice system? We, who are in the body of Christ, need to be advocates; just like the apostle Paul advocated on behalf of Onesimus, the runaway slave, in his letter to Philemon. Under Roman law, Philemon had the right, as Onesimus' owner, to put him to death. Paul wisely saw that this young man (most Bible scholars agree that Onesimus likely was a teenager) was not a "throwaway kid", he had value. We need to recognize that juvenile offenders have value. They are also created in the image of God. They need the hope and healing that Jesus brings. They often need a voice. What does it mean to be an advocate?

• Lobby for improvements in your state's juvenile justice system. While our system is certainly better than what we see in the Philippines, there is always room for improvement. Let's make sure that juveniles are treated as who they are - kids. This doesn't mean that they are not to be held accountable or even avoid incarceration, but they shouldn't be treated exactly as adults and viewed as throwaways.
• Visit youth who are incarcerated. They love having people come visit them, and are often amazed when people spend time with them when they are not being paid to. Jesus said that when we visit those who are in prison (and that would also include juvenile detention centers) then we have also visited Him, (Matthew 25:34-40). Serve Our Youth Network has many opportunities for people to get involved as Bible discussion group leaders, volunteer chaplains, mentors and visitors. If you do not live in Iowa - check out Straight Ahead Network and its affiliates to see if there is a ministry that reaches out to juvenile offenders where you live.
  
• Welcome them when they are back home. This is key. Youth need encouragement that they can make changes. It is one thing to be resolved to change when they on the inside, but quite a different story on the "outs". Kids need help with job skills, they need to be given a chance with employers, and sometimes need advocates when it comes to getting back into school. They need life skills training. They need loving, supportive accountability. They need people who are going to welcome them into local churches because that is not a natural transition for them.

If the Church does not do this... who will?

Technorati Tags: Juvenile Justice, Social Justice, Youth Advocacy, Youth Ministry

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Think Before You Post

HT: Tim Schmoyer

Technorati Tags: Internet Safety, Youth Culture

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Hamburgers are cool again - whew!

Fox News reports that Wendy's is trying to win young consumers over with its new ad. They have been in a slump since their founder, Dave Thomas died in 2002. As you may remember Dave Thomas was the center of Wendy's advertising campaign. This new commercial has been posted on YouTube and is just downright weird.

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Christian Teens Confused About Heaven

The Christian Post had an article - "Christian Teens Confused About Heaven" today. It not a surprising article to me, but interesting anyhow. I guess the lesson for parents, pastors, youth pastors and volunteer youth leaders is to assume nothing with your kids. There are too many biblically illiterate kids graduating from church youth ministries. How to stem the tide?

I'd love to read you comments on that question.

Youth Leadership within the Church

Interesting article on Christian Post about Christian Endeavor International's launch to a nationwide push to fight the youth crisis.

A new nationwide youth push has evangelicals asking, "When did we stop trusting our youth?" America's future rests on more than the next generation itself, but on the nation's belief in the capacity of our youth to do great things, says one international ministry leader.

Timothy Eldred, executive director of Christian Endeavor International, hopes the adult generation will do more than give lip service with "I believe in youth."

"Most everyone says 'I believe in young people; I believe God has equipped young people,'" noted Eldred. "Really?" he asked, with a hint of skepticism.

"What are you letting them do? What are they leading? If they don't lead the church, they leave the church," he said. (Read more) (Source: Christian Post)

One of my biggest pet peeves is when I hear, "our youth are the church of tomorrow." No they aren't. They are the Church of today. I think anything that will help engage adults in ministry to youth to spark ministry by youth is a good thing. Anyway, read the complete article and share your thoughts by commenting on this post.

Battling VIctoria Secret's vs. AIDS Walk

This last weekend I took a group from First Baptist Church to Kansas City, MO for the Acquire the Fire Conference. It has been awhile since I've been on a trip like this so I really enjoyed it - lack of sleep and all.

Friday night we got sooooo lost trying to find Kemper Arena. We needed to pull over to look at a map and I found a spot outside of a downtown Jazz club. I'm sure the image of a Baptist church van parked outside of a jazz club is now seered in someones brain.

The theme for the conference was "Branded by God". I have mixed feelings about the conference. I appreciate the appeal to youth to not be apathetic about their faith and on Friday night many kids committed their lives to Christ. I struggled however, with the message from Ron Luce about branding - sharing how corporations try to brand kids with their product. It is a deplorable practice. It fosters materialism and that is an attitude that should not be present in the life of a believer. How does one know that they are branded? If I really like Starbucks (which I do), am I branded by them? I don't think so (I am actually equal opportunity with coffee - I like coffee period). Do people know me as one who likes Starbucks, and not one who is a follower of Jesus Christ. Absolutely not.

I admit that I am likely simplifying this, and I know their are kids who are in bondage to branding, materialism, and trying to gain acceptance by outward appearance and practice. I am also sure their are kids who are know more for the brands that they like, and not for their faith in Jesus Christ. I can think of a few kids in past ministry who would fall into that category. So I'm not so sure that my problem is so much with the message that was given, but rather how it was presented. Kids were also encouraged to destroy that which brands them. One of my students asked in regards to clothes - "wouldn't it be better to give the clothes to those who need them?" My sentiments exactly.

Also at the end of the conference Ron Luce talked about the war before us - spiritual war and culture war. He exhorted kids to stand up to things they see in their culture that contradicts the Bible. Regular readers to this blog will know that I speak out on topics that I believe impacts culture, so you know my heart. I have to respectfully disagree with the approach that Ron Luce is advocating. He listed numerous examples of kids speaking out, one such example included a group of 30 kids going into a Victoria's Secret one by one asking the store manager to remove the posters in the front windows. One by one they were kicked out. Finally after the 30th student was kicked out they as a group went in shouting their demand that they take the posters down. After what, I'm sure was an awkward moment the manager relented. Customers were staring, and I can't help but think what message about Jesus was communicated in this whole episode. Some other questions come to mind. Did the posters went back up later? Does the store manager even have the authority to remove the posters (since they are a chain store)? Why the group think it was okay to go into the store after they all had just been kicked out?

Sunday morning we attended Rivercity Community Church which was located about two miles from our hotel. I have to give props to this church. It was a newer church (been around 7-8 years), and was a smaller congregation (I estimate slightly over 100 for the Sunday we were there). They were incredibly welcoming. I felt at home, I had at least 11 people come up to me to introduce themselves. I felt comfortable. The worship was engaging, simple and done with excellence. The sermon was biblical and engaging - actually it was a counter message to what we heard from Ron Luce. The title of the sermon was "Love wins". The pastor shared that the world often operates like this: we have authority, which holds us accountable, and if we do what authority wants we are accepted and then affirmed. Jesus flips that around - he accepted and affirms (loves) then holds people accountable and exercises authority. We need to love and then truth-tell. We are commanded to speak truth in love, (Ephesians 4:15). How often do we really do that? They were putting that into practice by participating in an AIDS walk (they have a ministry they call "Church on the Streets" which will find ways to demonstrate love to their community. For a lot of our kids, the service on Sunday morning was the highlight of the weekend. It was for me as well.

Love does win.

No Such Thing as a Free Lunch

As some Jr. High students in Idaho learned, you have to pay up! Judging from some of the meals I've eaten at school as a student, member of faculty or as a youth pastor coming on campus I wonder if the schools shouldn't have to pay the kids on occassion?

No matter how you feel about the tactics this school employed, you have to admit it was effective. Jr. High students benefit from concrete, tangible consequences and lessons.

BattleCry in San Francisco

Teen Mania Ministries is being targeted (no surprise here) by the secular progressive press because they have the audacity to bring their Battlecry event to San Francisco. Read this article in the Barre/Montplier (VT) Times Argus (written by a reporter from the San Francisco Journal) and let me know if you think some editorializing is going on in this "news" piece. Ridiculous? Here is another example of people playing fast and loose with the word tolerance.

Middle School Ministry Forgotten?

Middle School Ministry is a real challenge. What to do with it, how do we treat these kids. Run a 6th - 8th grade ministry? Do 5th-6th grade and a 7th - 8th grade? Some school districts & churches have middle school as 7th - 9th grade and high school as 10th -12th grade.

The Christian Post had an article on "Forgotten Middle School Ministry". Pretty interesting. I was wondering if I could hear from you. What do you do? What do you think? Please share your comments.

As some of you may know Cheryl and I home educate our kids. Kelvey though is taking band at Pleasant Hill Elementary School, and she is in 5th Grade. We are in the Des Moines School District - they do middle schools (6th - 8th grade) and she would have to take band at Hiatt Middle School next year. She is a young 5th grader (we started her early), and do not think that is the best environment for her, so we've decided to get her enrolled next year at Four Mile Elementary School, which is in the S.E. Polk School District. Our church, Valley Church, has a 5th/6th grade ministry (Route 56) which Kelvey just loves. The student ministries at Valley just started a combined junior high/senior high service on Sunday mornings.

Anyway, I'd love to hear your thoughts about what churches should do, and what school districts should do. Thanks!

Why Evangelism Doesn't Work?

Greg Stier, the president of Dare 2 Share Ministries in Arvada, CO wrote a column for the Christian Post today about "Why Evanglism Doesn't Work Anymore."

What do you think? I believe often times it is the Great Omission in the Church, not just with teenagers, but with adults too. People simply don't feel like they have to share their faith.

31 Accepted Beliefs About Youth Ministry

Mark Riddle in his blog today listed 31 things that we have come to accept in youth ministry. As I read through this list, I do see this in American youth ministry today. This has to change. I'm sure this list is not exhaustive. I would love to hear from you. What do you agree with, what don't you agree with, what needs to be added to the list (I'm sure it isn't exhaustive), what dissapoints you the most and so forth. The statements in bold are what dissapoint me the most with the current view of youth ministry

1. Youth pastor turnover- That a youth pastor will only stay for a short time.

2. That the success or failure of the spiritual nurture of our kids is based primarily on the giftedness or lack thereof, of a person filling the youth position.

3. That the assumption by church leadership is that best youth pastors are young.

4. That a youth pastor can/will/should disciple themselves without the guidance of a senior pastor.

5. That a healthy gauge to tell when youth ministry is going well is when there are no complaints.

6. That Senior Pastors should not be involved in youth ministry.

7. That parents should not be involved in youth ministry.

8. That we give lip service to parents being the primary spiritual nurturers of their children, but do absolutely nothing to actually support parents in our church.

9. That so many youth pastors who feel called to ministry, leave vocational ministry before they turn 30.

10. That youth ministry is church for teens.

11. That youth have different basic needs than adults.

12. That youth have been systematically abandoned by adults within the culture and the church has done the same.

13. That having a youth pastor means the youth ministry is taken care of.

14. That the best youth ministries keep kids busy.

15. That it's a sin to bore a kid.

16. That kids don't think about theology or they aren't ready for it.

17. That we do very little theological reflection when it comes to why we have a youth ministry.

18. The assumption that kids just want fun and games rather than relationships and theological engagement.

19. That Christian Education is an answer to all our problems.

20. That parental involvement in the spiritual development of their children is optional.

21. That the systematic estrangement of adolescents in our church is best for the kids and their “age level appropriate” activities and living out the gospel.

22. That kids only receive the benefits of a youth ministry/youth pastor and do not need to contribute to make this ministry happen.

23. That youth ministry is something only some of us in the church do.

24. That youth ministry is something that happens in a program at the church.

25. That all problems can be fixed with a program.

26. The perception that once I’ve grown my kids into college that I no longer need to work with youth.

27. That the youth pastor is actually just a director of activities.

28. That we no longer remember what a pastor is in many local churches.

29. That youth pastors have forgotten the reason they got into youth ministry in the first place because they are burdened with responsibilities they are miserable at accomplishing.

30. That Jesus himself could not live up to the wildly inappropriate expectations a church has for a youth pastor.

31. That there is no healthy way to manage the expectations of the church.

Do young sex offenders belong on the adult register?

Great question poised by the Sex Offender Issues Blog. I'd be curious to hear what you think. Our ministry works with a lot of young sex offenders. I struggle with the answer to that - it depends on the hat I'm wearing - Dad or SOY Staff.

Please share your opinion by posting a comment. I look forward to hearing from you.